Guess Who Is Stupid? The Dallas Cowboys

Why you ask? Well, where do I even begin. In his old age, Jerry Jones has gone batty. He is turning the Cowboys into a total circus. Every day, more news flutters through the sports pages and every new piece of information adds more kindling to the campfire... that happens to be located right next to the field of really dry long grass, which is right next door to the non-daily creamer factory (quite flammable believe it or not).

The Cowboys already assembled a tabloid circus over the past couple years due in large part to the "newsworthy" sagas of Tony and Jessica's Thanksgiving Turkey eating habits and Terrell Owens habit of putting his jockstrap on Billy Cundiff's face and pushing him into the shower with Wade Phillips (yeah, I made that up).

Still, Jones wants more media. First, he signs Pac Man Jones after his 2007 expulsion for infamous "Making it Rain" incident, adding yet another misbehaved ass to the roster. So far, that makes count 'em three, complete media frenzies in Dallas.

Next, not only is Hard Knocks headed back to the Dallas camp after a few years hiatus in Kansas City (I can't say I blame HBO for this move. The Chiefs suck), but Jones is actually entertaining the idea of allowing the show to air over the course of the regular season. Can you even begin to imagine the disadvantage this brings to a team. Not only does it give rival teams direct access to you personnel decisions and areas of focus each week, but it brings an unprecedented level of distraction for players. For the record, I am all for it, but it is unfathomably retarded from a management standpoint. Anyone got any hot donuts?

Want me to keep going? Yeah, there's actually more. Our pal, Matt Mosley from Hashmarks, reported that the Cowboys are actually looking at Steve Smith. The Panthers are apparently pretty fed up after he beat the shit out of his own teammate and allegedly caused him to get a nose job.

Are you getting my point yet? This is a total shit show. Can you even imagine the lethal combination of TO, Jessica Simpson, Terrell Owens, Pac Man Jones, and a TV show? I'd rather mix bleach, nitroglycerin, vinegar, and battery acid and drink it than try to run a football team with these elements present. Granted, a couple of these things are just speculative, but this is gonna end badly no matter how you slide. No level of hard ass coaching can contain the infinite amount of media crap that this team is going to face.

There is a long-time word sports people like to throw around and they say it means something. It's called chemistry. Jerry Jones, you should learn it.