Life Imitates Art - Why Athletes Cheat

Whether it be the meteoric rise of popularity for gangsta rap, the glamorization violence and drugs in the movies, or overtly sexual television shows marketed to teenagers, there exists a longstanding strong debate that kids imitate what the see in the media. Many people strongly believe that these mainstays of popular culture are influencing the nation's youth to have premarital sex, use drugs, speak fowl dialects, and even carry- or worse - use guns. It's an argument that wage forever as soccer moms and haters of the first amendment fight their perpetual war on "explicit content." While we're clearly all for free speech around here, but they do make a decent enough point. If kids witness this stuff on television and in the media, it normalizes to some extent and does in fact even glamorize it.

For the sake of this writing, let's just assume that these people are right. What we see on the media does in fact shape our behaviors and influence our society to behave like these pop culture icons. Perhaps, another example should be included in the debate that life imitates art. Given all of the cheating that goes on in sports movies, how can we not expect the same from our professional athletes? We have all grown up watching one sports movie after another here our hero of the story is a cheater. They not only make us root for the hero, but they go as far as to make the cheater the underdog in many cases.

It pretty much seems as though we hear about another cheater in pro sports everyday, whether it be Human Growth Hormone, Spygate, or other performance enhancing drugs, we should expect this. Just think about it, we have been inundated with the glory of cheating since the beginning of time. Hollywood loves and cheater, so why are we surprised to see real pros imitating those on the big screen. Just think back to all of your favorite sports movies - all cheaters.

Flubber - If any movie has ever glamorized cheating, Flubber would have to take the prize. Flubber is a scientifically concocted super substance by the absent minded professor that is essentially really bouncy. Thus, when you applied it to the shoes, you could get mad air. Even back in 1961, these super white basketball players were skying for dunks like Tom Chambers.

Be Like Mike - Another example of shoe cheating. I think since the 80's and early 90's, instanced of shoe cheating has declined rapidly, but it's still a concern. In this instance, Calvin Cambridge hid the powers of the greatest basketball player in NBA history, Michael Jordan, in his shoes.

Angels in the Outfield - I think this might have been what Dock Ellis was doing when he tossed his No-No on acid. In this movie, the Angels were aided by imaginary angels that would lift them up and fly them over to tough fly balls to make key plays. They try to play it off like angels are good because they are from heaven and shit, but it's still cheating.

Happy Gilmore - Again, tough break underdog has to save grandma's house. Cry me a river. Every cheater has a story. Sure, I had a prescription for the HGH, because I have a pituitary gland problem. Hmmmm, so your online dentist prescribed you medicine for a pituitary deficiency? Well, same thing here. Just because you suck at hockey and have to help out grandma, doesn't mean you can use an illegal swing, running start, and a putter for the mentally ill.

Ladybugs - This is pretty sick. What kind of pervert dresses up like a girl to join an all girls soccer team. Sure, we'd all love to hang around the girls locker room and dress in cute pink panties, but there are lines you just don't cross.

Rookie of the Year - This kid couldn't even wait until he was an adult to cheat in the major leagues, he cheated at age 10. I can't blame him for the determination, but undergoing a medical operation to enhance arm strength is going too far to put a little more mustard on the Red Hot. Come on kids, with a balanced diet, a good weight room regimen, and good coaching, you can make the bigs without cheating.

The Mighty Ducks - Taking kids from other school districts and homeless drifters off the street? What's next, buying houses for athletes' families, high school recruiting, and shady "academic" scholarships? Oh wait, nevermind. Too late.

Teen Wolf - Just because Scott was not the most popular guy in school and the team was down on their luck, does not mean that a potentially violent werewolf with superhuman jumping ability, fangs, and sharp talons should be allowed to compete. That wolf was a loose cannon - spotted around town buying kegs for underage beer parties and surfing on top of motor vehicles. Besides, it's bad enough playing D against fat sweaty men, but a hairy wolf? That's unfair.

The Program - Lattimer was straight up junk. He cheated the most common way, injecting steroids. Nevertheless, we saw that by taking steroids you can get laid and then dwarf toss the girl when you're done to get her the fuck out. This is a glamorization of steroids of sorts as no men really want to cuddle after some hot action, so steroids apparently take care of that problem.

Gus - In this blatant violation of rules, the California Atoms employed a mule/mascot to kick field goals. According to the NFL Rule, Atricle XVII.3 - NFL players must be under all occasions upright standing Homo Sapiens with no more than two legs. Hooves are not means permitted. Despite a long litigious battle, it was however determined that feet with no toes are not considered hooves and may be used in field goal tries.